Overly
Worried or Overly Detached
Overly worried or overly detached is something that
affects many people ,especially when it comes to family . No one
wants to be hurt or be in constant emotional pain,yet trying to
overly detach from a situation and or overly worried isn't good
physically ,emotionally and spiritually. Both worry and detachment
I believe can and does cause illnesses. There is a middle ground a
point in which you are neither so attached (worried ) as to affect
your emotional balance and not so detached as to have a heart that is
so hard that when there is a legitimate request for help that you
ignore it, that middle ground isn't achieved very well on ones own
power .
Psychology give's reasons for these behaviors and
solutions to over coming them ,yet in everything I've read God isn't
part of the solution. Using the solutions from psychology, its done
on your own power ,although this may work for a time ,is it a true
solution . Is there a biblical solution ,maybe a heart issue? I'll be
looking at the psychological view and a biblical view of over
coming worry and detachment.
This
is the thought process that creates the feelings and
emotions experienced as anxiety. Worrying can
be useful in helping to find solutions to problems;
however, worrying often centers on problems that
cannot currently be solved. Thinking soon becomes
very negative and doom laden, and this is misusing
the imagination.
This
worrisome thinking style can easily create
the conditions that make a person feel anxious:
- Helplessness – Insufficient information to handle the situation.
- Over stimulation – Too much information, or information overload.
- Incongruity – Conflicting information.
- Unpredictability – Having an uncertain outcome.
Solutions to worry
Worry and anxiety self-help tip #1: Create a worry period**
Postpone
your worry.
If
an anxious thought or worry comes into your head during the day, make
a brief note of it on paper and postpone it to your worry period.
Remind yourself that you’ll have time to think about it later, so
there’s no need to worry about it right now. Save it for later and
continue to go about your day.
Worry and anxiety self-help tip #2: Ask yourself if the problem is solvable
Can
you do something about the problem or prepare for it, or is it out of
your control?Productive,
solvable worries are those you can take action on right away. For
example, if you’re worried about your bills, you could call your
creditors to see about flexible payment options. Unproductive,
unsolvable worries are those for which there is no corresponding
action. “What if I get cancer someday?” or “What if my kid gets
into an accident?”
Worry and anxiety self-help tip #3: Accept uncertainty
But
what if the worry isn’t something you can solve? If you’re a
chronic worrier, the vast majority of your anxious thoughts probably
fall in this camp. In such cases, it’s important to tune into your
emotions.
This
may seem scary at first because of negative beliefs you have about
emotions. For example, you may believe that you should always be
rational and in control, that your feelings should always make sense,
or that you shouldn’t feel certain emotions, such as fear or anger.
The
inability to tolerate uncertainty plays a huge role in anxiety and
worry. Chronic worriers can’t stand doubt or unpredictability. They
need to know with 100 percent certainty what’s going to happen.
Worrying is seen as a way to predict what the future has in store—a
way to prevent unpleasant surprises and control the outcome. The
problem is, it doesn’t work.
Worry and anxiety self-help tip #4: Challenge anxious thoughts
Identifying
the frightening thought, being as detailed as possible about what
scares or worries you. Then, instead of viewing your thoughts as
facts, treat them as hypotheses you’re testing out. As you examine
and challenge your worries and fears, you’ll develop a more
balanced perspective.
Stop worrying by questioning the worried thought
- What’s the evidence that the thought is true? That it’s not true?
- Is there a more positive, realistic way of looking at the situation?
- What’s the probability that what I’m scared of will actually happen?
- If the probability is low, what are some more likely outcomes?
- Is the thought helpful? How will worrying about it help me and how will it hurt me?
- What would I say to a friend who had this worry?
** Help Guide.org
All these solutions for worry yet , God isn't mentioned
these are all done on your own ,by yourself. How many people who deal
with worry can truly do these thing and not worry if they will be
able to achieve the desired results? Probably not many.
9 Worry Busting
steps *
No.
1. Make a list of your worries
Identify
what you are worried about,
No.
2. Analyze the list
"Look
at whether your worry is productive or unproductive,"
No.
3. Embrace uncertainty
You
need to accept your own limitations or it may be a degree of
uncertainty that you need to accept.
No.
4. Bore yourself calm.
"Repeat
a feared thought over and over and it will become boring and will go
away,"
No
5. Make yourself uncomfortable.
"Worriers
feel that they can't tolerate discomfort, but if you practice
discomfort, you will accomplish a lot more,"
No
6. Stop the clock.
I
need the answer right now and if I don't get it then something
terrible will happen.'" Look at the advantages and disadvantages
of demanding such urgency. "Rather than focus on the sense of
urgency, instead focus on what you observe right now,"
No
7. Remember that it's never as bad as you think it will be.
The
'what ifs' are always way worse than how you feel when something
actually happens. "Worriers tend to worry about things that even
if they happen, they can handle it,"
No
8. Cry out loud.
"The
emotional part of the brain --
the amygdala -- is suppressed when you worry,"
No
9. Talk about it
Beside
the cognitive therapy techniques mentioned above -- which can help
change troublesome behaviors -- talk therapy can also help chronic
worriers worry less by getting to the root of their issues. Often
talk therapy and cognitive behavior therapy can work together,
*From Web MD
Whats the
Word of God say about worry?
What
does worry accomplish?
[27]
And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span
of life? (Matthew 6:27 ESV)
This
is a rhetorical question ,worry doesn't add to your life span if
anything is diminishes it. Worry destroys life.
[31]
Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or
‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ [32] For the
Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows
that you need them all. [33] But seek first the kingdom of God and
his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
(Matthew 6:31-33 ESV)
God
in His omniscience already knows the needs of His people. Members of
the kingdom should not be worried with things since their heavenly
Father is already aware of them.
The
kingdom should be the primary focus of Christians and the object
their desire. As result, the fullness of God’s blessing will
manifest in
their lives. Christians would have a better ability to deal with
life’s events ,a calmness if they would first seek the kingdom of
God . Trusting in the Father’s provision serves as an antidote to
worry.
Prov
3:5 Trust
in the Lord with all your heart, and do
not lean on your own understanding.6 In
all your ways acknowledge him, and he will
make straight your paths.
Wisdom
comes from God, we must trust Him. This often involves relying on
God’s wisdom rather than our own . Our own understanding is often associated with our feelings ,and our feelings can be misleading us,especially due to a close association to the situation .We may say yes to something when God is saying NO. .Trust in His guidance.
Luke
8:14 And
as for what fell among the thorns, they are those who hear, but as
they go on their way they are choked by the cares
and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature.
Greek
:merimna
means care,anxiety,worry :the
cares ( worries)
of
the world choke out growth,
Not focusing on God during troubled times .
Worry
removes your focus as Christians we shouldn't worry about things
like the unsaved do.
Scripture
for combating worry
God
knows your needs
Matt
6:32b:your
heavenly Father knows that you need them all.
God
knows your needs
,take your worries to him.
See God is with
you
Josh1:9 Have
I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be
frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your
God is with you wherever you go.”
God
is always with you during troubles times and peaceful times
Ps
64:10a
be
still and know I am God.
Be
still take a moment and know God is with you,take a breath.
Trust
in Gods promises
Isa
41:10
fear
not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your
God;I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you
with my righteous right hand.
Rely
on Gods strength to carry you through
Prov
3:5 Trust
in the Lord with all your heart,and do not lean on
your own understanding.6 In
all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make
straight your paths.
Rely
on the promises of God to help you through all things
Pray
Ps
55:22 Cast
your burden on the Lord,and he will sustain you;he will never
permit the righteous to be moved.
Philippians
4: 6 do
not be anxious
(worry)about
anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with
thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the
peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your
hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Trust in God to
answer your prayer and meet your NEEDS in dealing with worry not
necessarily your desires. Trust in his will for you.
But
seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness,
5 Words To Guard
Against Worry
Fear
Not:
Isa 41:10 fear
not,
for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God;I will
strengthen you, I will help you,I will uphold you with my
righteous right hand.
Wait:Ps
27:4 Wait
for
the Lord;be strong, and let your heart take courage;wait for
the Lord!
So how do we do
the things mentioned ? PRACTICE
Philippians
4:8 Finally,
brothers, whatever
is
true,
whatever is
honorable,
whatever is
just,
whatever is
pure,
whatever is
lovely,
whatever is
commendable,
if there is any
excellence,
if there is
anything worthy of
praise,
think about these things. 9 What
you have learned and received and heard and seen in
me—practice
these things, and the God of peace will be with you.
The
things that are true,honorable,just
,pure,lovely,commendable,excellent,and worthy. Dwell on them practice
them . Gods peace will be with you.
Heb
5:14 But
solid
food is for the mature,
for those who have their powers of discernment trained
by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.
Constant
training is required in order to become mature and able to
distinguish right from wrong or on how to deal with any situation in
life.
Neh
8:13 On
the second day the heads of fathers' houses of all the people, with
the priests and the Levites, came together to Ezra the scribe in
order to
study the words of the Law.
Study
the Word ,you cant practice something you really don't know about,
how can you wait on God ,cast your burdens on God , trust God ect ect
.If you don't really know. Study and practice what you learn. One
last verse .This is one of my favorites .
Ezra
7:10 For
Ezra had set his heart to
study the
Law of the Lord, and
to do it and
to teach his
statutes and rules in Israel.
I'm not saying you should be teaching with this verse ,
I'm more concerned with the first two things .Setting your mind to
study Gods Word and Doing (Practice) Gods Word
If you can practice the steps to combating worry
according to Gods Word I know your worries will drop to a point that
is more manageable and maybe even solvable ,then it become a concern
(solution oriented ) And in that it still depends on if you could
even solve it or not.When the worry becomes a concern with Gods help then you will have found that middle ground,that point of not being over invested in a situation or under invested.
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